Normally I walk through downtown Seattle and ignore the crazy things. One gets to work faster if they ignore all the diversions.
However, somethings simply cannot be overlooked.
Why is there a smokestack in the middle of the street? As in, the middle of a three-lane road?
Having no answers, I choose to make them up. So…
My Notions of Why There is a Smokestack
- The Seattle Underground, tired of being ignored for a century, is making inroads (get it?) into the surface world. It started off as sewer grates. Then came those elevators that rose up out of the sidewalk. Now; metallic smokestacks. Soon: The City. One day… the world.
- The Morlocks. You know… The Time Machine. H.G. Wells. Yeah, them.
- Steampunk just took it to a whole other level. (Ba-dump.)
- The newest trend in building: Start at the roof and work your way from there… upside down! The chimney is installed, next comes the roof! And, just to be different, they build it, not on a traditional plot, but in the middle of the road. Non-conformity; because who wants houses that blend in?
- The Underground Railroad is back. But somebody took a wrong turn and got the train stuck. (P.S. Read Brad Meltzer’s new book. Seriously. It has pictures.)
- Millennials. No reason or logic. However, it seems to be the current trend to blame Millennials. (Or, whatever political party spoke last.) So yeah, Millennials. (Shrug) I dunno.
- We are finally going back to a pneumatic tube delivery system. Hooray!
- A truck was driving around with a series of large pipes and one of them fell off. It plummeted with such velocity that it embedded itself in the pavement. Smoke resulted.
- New nuclear missile silos are getting smaller and more public. Also, really obvious to the casual observer.
- The city’s newest garbage cans are only for its tallest residents.
- Park your pogo stick here. (Disembarking is the hard part.)
Thoughts? Ideas? Answers?
And yes, if you have some sort of civil engineering background, you can leave the real answer as to what is happening. (If you must…)
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