Part of me has absolutely no problem watching back to back DVDs of Dawson’s Creek. Another, larger part of me shakes my head, rolls my eyes, and channels Joey’s mantra that, “It’s time to grow up.” (She says it over and over in the first season.)
In my defense, the Joey-Pacey coupling is probably my favorite television relationship. They rank higher than Rachel and Ross, about even with Paul and Jamie, and right around Rob and Laura. Those two kids are always at their best when paired together.
Pacey has a very finely set moral compass. When it comes to himself, he can be a pretty stupid kid (even in his later years). If his friends need him, he leaps into the fray without thinking. He does not tolerate disparaging remarks about his loved ones, he gets between them and harm, and he is quite supportive. The guy makes me squirm when he sleeps with his teacher <insert giant groan of annoyance>, but he is a pretty great rebel-hero. (Apparently the actor even saved somebody from a lake one day, so kudos to him.)
Plus, outside of Joey and Pacey, pretty much every other main character makes me want to slam my head against the wall, throw the remote against the wall, and climb the wall in frustration. (Thankfully, there are no walls without striking distance of my couch.)
Jen drives me nuts every single episode. She’s drunk. She’s frisky. She’s crying. Ack. Dawson thinks it is all about him (see the tallies below). Give me Mr. Leery on The Flash because he is not as good on this show. The mom; do not even get me started. And Joey paired with Dawson frustrates me.
I am supposed to be upset with Grams. The show has been seen as anti-Christian. But it honestly works just fine with me. Is she pious? Sure. However, if I cannot take a little criticism about my religion, then what does that say about me? Grams has her standards, she wishes her granddaughter would share them, yet she loves her relative regardless.
In order to make this all clearer, I did something no logical person would do while watching Dawson’s Creek. I took notes. Covering a random four-episode run, and provided for your edu-tainment:
Dawson’s Creek by the Numbers (not counting credits or “previously on”)
Someone says “Dawson”- 28 (add to that, Mitch saying, “Son”)
Multisyllabic words were needlessly used in place of normal words- 13 (wunderkind was used twice)
Sexual euphemisms- 6 (mostly due to four females watching Good Will Humping)
Relationships were rehashed/ ranted (a.k.a. Exposition Alert)- 7
Guitar/ piano/ music overdramatically sets tone- 4
Porn video- 1 (bonus points for it being on VHS. Oh late ‘90s.)
Notes: I get why they had a character like Abbie. I do. It does not mean I cared when she died later.
Someone says “Dawson”- 20
Multisyllabic words were needlessly used in place of normal words- 7 (including “unequivocally” and “cosmetic enhancement”. “Cosmetic enhancement”? That is terrible. Just say “Makeup”. Ugh. What are you doing?)
Sexual euphemisms- 2
Relationships were rehashed/ ranted (a.k.a. Exposition Alert)- 6
Guitar/ piano/ music overdramatically sets tone- 5
Rachel Leigh Cook appears naked- 1 (Mostly notable because I love Rachel Leigh Cook. And she delivered one my favorite lines, “Careful Dawson, stronger men than you have been crushed by what I think”.)
Notes: Grams marvels at how a woman can be a movie producer and how wonderful the opportunity is for females. Yay Grams! Also, do not let that rehash count fool you. The entire episode was about turning season one into a movie. A movie which he would go back and remake in season five. And in season six, he goes and turns the exact same storyline into a television series. But it all started here. Retreaded plot much?)
Someone says “Dawson”- 5 (also, “Man”, via Pacey)
Multisyllabic words were needlessly used in place of normal words- 1 (Pacey-centric= better writing!)
Sexual euphemisms- 0 !!! (See! Pacey makes it better!)
Relationships were rehashed/ ranted (a.k.a. Exposition Alert)- 8
Guitar/ piano/ music overdramatically sets tone- 5
Homophobic slur- 1
Notes: Thankfully, Dawson takes the back seat. Pacey shows signs of being a true hero. Should he have spit in the face? No. Does everything else he does in the episode make me want to hug him? Yep. Mr. Pederson can bite me. (I have to give the writers credit for making a worthy bad guy.)
Someone says “Dawson”- 10 (one of these, he refers to himself in the third person. Barf. This guy…)
Multisyllabic words were needlessly used in place of normal words- 1
Sexual euphemisms- 3
Relationships were rehashed/ ranted (a.k.a. Exposition Alert)- 8
Guitar/ piano/ music overdramatically sets tone- 4
Notes: Grams gets some respect. She lectures a snooty teenager that Jack needs love and tolerance, not judgment. Yay Grams! Pacey rules once more. He shows compassion to his fellow students by removing a blight from the educational system.
In case you think 13 and 14 started a trend of sharing the spotlight; nope. The “Dawson” count surged again in the next episode. Dawson celebrated his sixteenth birthday. Complete with everyone attending Dawson’s party while Dawson was taken to a bar and Dawson’s parents bought Dawson a car before Dawson came home drunk to fall into Dawson’s cake. Oy.
Clearly, this is not the greatest show ever made. Why do I not just skip to the episodes I like? Why all the hate-watching?
In this regard, Dawson’s Creek is like life. You have to suffer the bad moments to make the happy ones mean something. Only by seeing how terrible Joey-Dawson is do I really appreciate how fantastic Pacey-Joey is. Do I like all the angst, griping, and bad-crying? Not at all. But in season three, it all pays off. Pacey and Joey start sharing screen time without any blonde do-nothings cluttering things up. (Apparently I only like brunettes in Dawson’s Creek. But I am equally ambivalent towards the blonde-brunette siblings, so that makes it okay; right?)
Do I wish to relive my car crash from when I was eighteen or the time I actually hurt someone physically? Nope. However without those I would be less appreciative of the mountain hikes and airport moments. You have to take at least some bad to wade through before you can arrive at the delightful.
That being said, I have watched all these episodes before. There is no need to be a sadist (Jen does that just fine all on her own). I reserve the right to fast forward bad scenes at will.
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